Facing Our Ugly Ego
We will now be examining many spiritual principles in the pages that follow and if you have eyes to see and ears to hear will come to understand the real unfortunate condition we must admit we are in, which most see as normal human behavior. This however, is the price of the forbidden fruit Adam didn’t foresee before he ate. Yet, we shall see all of this is necessary to experience in order to understand the distinction between good and evil. This reading needs to be understood as part of the process of building righteous holy character, for we must be holy for YHWH is holy.
We therefore must first come to see our despicable state of mind , which we appease, for what it really is, Evil. We must acknowledge it and replace with holy goodness. This is the struggle every human being will have to undergo in order to reach spiritual birth into the Kingdom of Yah (God). Now all the knowledge one may gain is fruitless without wisdom and wisdom comes from Yah. For wisdom is the one thing Satan didn’t give Adam and Eve. Therefore ask for spiritual wisdom as Solomon asked, otherwise knowledge will be misplaced. For knowledge puffs up but love edifies the soul.
Ask then for wisdom that you may have understanding for the world is full of it. Worldly wisdom that is.
We will now embark on a short journey of soul searching and understand what makes us tick as carnal human beings. It will be a snapshot of the totality of our human condition. We will go a little deeper into the mind and hopefully come to an understanding of the controlling factors causing us to behave as we do. We will face our ugly self and thru this knowledge hopefully see our need for God’s intervention, repent and start living Godly lives. This is the hopeful expectation of all I look to do in my writings. It does not make a different what religious or cultural background you may have. Human behaviour is an end product of the same poison just cloaked in a different color.
You see by eating of the fruit Adam ignited a chain of events altering the human consciousness thereby creating monsters such as Hitler. Each of us is thus premed to be our own shade of Hitler. It’s just a matter of the causes which we each face which shapes our individual self. We are however ignorant of the dynamics involved in the process, because knowledge has been missing and therefore we have been perishing. But if you have read thus far, after reading this you will be ignorant no more.
We have come to understand that God created man frail and subjected to the pull of the flesh. It was God who implanted vanity into Adam and Eve. Satan was merely a subject used for tempting Eve and seducing her with his craftiness to disobey. No different than what a man’s does with a woman he is out manipulate. No different than advertisers do to hypnotize the female to go out on a shopping spin. Have you notice how the man dreads going shopping with his wife or girlfriend. He is not so easily drawn to such things. He is however sexually weak and his appetite is appeased by the female. No wonder topless bar are a dime a dozen. See Satan attacked the woman for he knew she was created the weaker vessel spiritually and physically. This is a very important point to understand.
Now I am aware many females will recoil at my having said the above and will allow this to be a stumbling block to their growth. The fact of the matter is man and woman were both created with the same equal evolutional spiritual potential, but not physically or mentally equal. For a man to think and act like a woman would require him to acquire the spirit of a woman. This is what takes place in a homosexual lifestyle or vice verso as you shall see. Lets take a quick look at a Scriptural reference:
Gen 1:27 So God created man in his own image, in the image of God created he him; male and female created he him;…
When “man” is used it relates to both man and woman. For ‘he” (man) was created a man and a female version. A woman is basically a man, created out of the man with a “womb” plus the other obvious differences. For which Adam exclaimed:
Gen 2:23 And Adam said, This is now bone of my bones, and flesh of my flesh; she shall be called Woman, because she was taken out of the Man.
Man and woman look and think differently. I personally for example certainly have no desire to “embrace” my female side as some would have it. I am a man and have no desire or thought but that of a man. Woman can giggle and go to the bathroom together (usually for protection) and its alright. But I certainly would not ask my friend Joe to accompany me to the rest-room. That would be pretty weird! However, man and woman both have the same choices before them. You must understand Eve like Adam made a self willed choice in the Garden. A choice that is part of God’s master plan for the development and growth of man/woman into a spiritual being. By making choices man is able to develop the very attribute of God himself which is Gods purpose for man. The choices we make yields the lessons we shall all learn which will teach us right from wrong.
Let me digress for a moment and refer back to Feral Children for this is absolutely vital in presenting my point in regards to the mind of man and the make up of his brain function. If you haven’t read this article please do so. We read about those wild children raised by dogs earlier. We understand that the mind is like a tape recorder and children are like sponges absorbing the environment. The implications are not so obviously seen but are staggering when you understand it. We understand that a child exposed to dogs life will become a dog him or her self. They will acquire the same attributes, functionality and behaviour of a dog. They literally take on the “spirit” of a dog. Likewise, children who are expose to unmoral cultural and parental behaviors will acquire the spirit of that behavior. Are you with me?
So a myth engrained from birth in a child’s mind will become a reality in the psychic even though it is not. So people will give up their lives protecting their preconceived beliefs of many things which are not true. Just take a look at all the religious wars in the history of man. Than it is a shattering of an individual’s mind to one day have to face that something so real to them could be a lie. This is where you stand today as you read thru this article. Its like putting all the evidence together, should you do the research, and afterwards it paints an unbelievable shocking picture the mind will refuse to believe. An unbelievable picture that 911 and the war in Iraq have a much more underlining story than you have been told or are willing to believe. Just the fact of our President delivering his unflinching message to you on television cannot be accepted by the mind that he would be lying to you. It’s just too much to the psychic.
We have, believe it or not, have been hypnotized to our detriment to reason correctly from erroneous perception. Meaning most beliefs systems are false or truth mixed with lies reflecting the tree of good and evil. When you reason correctly from a false premise than all else that follow is wrong by default. The whole world system is based on truths and lies but never the whole truth or the whole lie. The average human being lives a world of lies. This has been done purposefully by those in control since they understand how the mind works and they have a motive. To control you. The science of controlling the masses lies in first appealing to the base natures, as did Satan, and then rewarding every irresponsible behavior and failing with a false sense of security. What you have in the long run is the prophecy of Satan deceiving the whole world been fulfilled starting with mother Eve. (Rev 12:9). For Satan is the prince of the power of the air broadcasting his negative anti God message to man. We therefore struggle with invisible forces and can only win the battle with the power of God himself. It is a spiritual thing! This is what we are dealing with here and must be understood as such. Lets break it down and take a look at what’s going on with us internally and understand.
The Wimp
Lets start by addressing Adam again. Adam by eating became a wimp (a man who clings to the skirt of a woman) of a man and passed on to Eve control which was given to him by the Creator. Rather than admonishing her for disobedience he gave in, bit the apple and behold Eve was founded to be naked. What happened to him next physically seeing her naked should be obvious. The battle of the sex began here friends. Ever since then women have learned to manipulate man’s weakness with her sensual favours and man has succumb to her seductions instead of standing tall as he was created. Woman all know to well as they have learned early what a man wants and how to satisfy that itch. Man falls as a helpless victim to her rendering himself to full control of the woman. The woman enjoys the control she has over him yet at the same time despises him in unsubtle ways for being the weakling that he is. She lets him know in no uncertain ways, by her outlandish often time bashing behaviour of her true feelings for him. Untrained as a young boy he has no idea what’s going on. Now should he wake up and try to change and play his proper role she hates him for doing so and will even dump him for another wimpy man. This happens everyday. We have the example of the patriots Job and Abraham who were both condemned for their faithfulness to God by their wives.
The woman wants to be a goddess and desire praises and worship only a wimp will give her in the form of submission, praises and endearment. If he doesn’t he is dammed to a hell he has not known. If he does he will be harshly judged as incompetent. So damn if he will damn if he doesn’t. A real man however, does not need the satisfaction of a woman. He does not need her justification or love. But most man seek a mother image see. Satan promised Eve she would be like God herself and she believed it. Additionally Mothers early in a male baby’s life smothers and molds her son into the very thing she hates, a wimp. Father not knowing what to do has given in to her and the child’s future is destined for damnation. So is the state of man and woman today and it diffuses into a myriads of role playing which has driven man and woman straight to the psychiatrist’s couch which they then make worst. Because the psychiatrist is plague also with the same poison which they don’t understand.
It is a vicious cycle which gives birth to child molester, woman beater, woman who love too much, bullies, abusers, homosexuality, etc, the list goes on and on. All simply because of a prideful puffed up Ego every human being has which they call their good self. The god within. For even the batter woman as sad as her condition is, is herself unknowingly, a control freak deploying her distorted tactics of appeasing her tyrant and feeding the monster who in turns gives her what she thinks she wants. His worship no matter how it comes. She has become damaged material who in turn with her sick partner will both breed the same. These two are a perfect match marching to the beat of the same sick drum. Here you have displayed before your eyes the generational curses predicted in the Scriptures which would plague generation after generation until one daring person would take the challenge to change.
We are all the like batter woman you see. Sick addicts of one thing or another, food, alcohol, perverted sex, love, work. joking, cursing, an endless list you pick one. But we live in DENIAL and lash out when someone points our ways. We have lost our innocence and replaced it with a judgemental mind because we are self made gods. And when correction comes to us what happens? We recoil back into a corner like an frightened cat with our claws extended. We feel this sting at that very moment. And what is this sting but what is called Resentment which is foster by continual judgement. We resent the truth because we know we are wrong and it’s causing us to look at it. We crinche and retaliate with anger at reprove even though we know the person is right. Think about what I am saying and be honest within yourself. Realize here is nothing more than the Ego fighting to keep alive. Your corrupt self righteousness. This alien force which has been driving you all along holding you prisoner. Are we understanding?
Like the alcoholic who repudiates a good admonishment for fear of facing his low self esteem. His incapacity to live to the expectation of a man which is driving him mad for not facing he is wrong. Or a woman who’s timeless attempts at a relationship has ended in misery and food has now become her consolation. She feels a sting as someone admonishes her constructively to change her eating habits. “Don’t tell me what to do!” She is full of resentment from failed love of parents, family, husband, etc. She like any other addict does not have the psychic ability to change.
We all need an empowering spirit to change. We need a doctor as Jesus said. But this empowering spirit will do exactly what he or she fears, the pointing of the prideful Ego. So she like anyone else rejects the truth which will cause her to look at the mirror of righteousness. Not until a person decides they have had enough suffering and hit rock bottom, until they reached that climax, they will preferred the deep mire to which they have become accustomed to. Here we are thus enslaved mentally and are collaborators in the making of our own enslavement. What we need to do is come out of denial and face the music and start the healing process. By reading this weather you understand it or not the process has already begun in you. Or you can stop turn on Joel Osteen and live a fantasy world.
But how do we actually become damaged? Well it is a subtle transformation which takes place unfortunately with our parents being our first tormentors. Deep down inside as we are growing up something horrible is happening to us we have no idea of. The very nature of the tormentors is taking shape inside us. The tormenting father, mother, brother, or intimidating sister has cast you into one of two dehumanizing roles, to become the very thing you hate, or, avoiding that eventuality through submission.
Emotions then become distorted (denial) and make it impossible to distinguish the true from the false love. This becomes deeply rooted and watered daily with dozens of little irritations, then our rage shocks us the first time it blows. Unaware of the fact that we have eventually become changelings, we are compelled to become one of two types. We become victims, compulsively seeking the love of tyrants, or the very thing we hate, a mental clone of our tyrant. Ours parents. The child who submits to a tyrant parent will marry the tyrant child of another broken home. The vicious cycle continuous exponentially, from generation to generation, creating the hell we know all too well.
Rejection
The one invisible factor brewing in this mire of chaos is the fear of rejection. Thru denial of security and affection our innate dependence as children, a venerable target, is attacked by those who are supposed to love us in a very sick way our very own parents. We then learn this fear which breeds insecurity in the physic eventually becomes the poison for mental enslavement to each other. It brings about a fake love in relationships when we finally mature. In this way we are set up to fail in marriages because the bonds and attachments are less than honest deep inside. We become nothing more than control freaks grasping for the attention we never received. The fear of rejection springs from the innate need we all have to be attached to something or someone. This need stems from the spiritual separation we have from God. We therefore, not knowing who God is, bond to our parents who are also separated from God themselves and we become sick like them. The true love of God however flows thru the father to the family, in this way children become attached to God not people. This is the failing factor in the scheme of thing. The ball has always been in Adams court.
Marriage
Tyranny is then awakened and fed by man and woman coming together in marriage, or for that matter, in any relationship. What a perfect world this would be were there no cowards, no weak-before-the-strong bullies who perpetuate the reign of misery upon us all. You may believe that you have forgiven your offenders for their past sins of omission and those of commission. But if this were true for all who make this claim, we would live in a very different world. A closer look at your present suffering reveals the projection of unfinished business upon your spouse and your children who you “love” so much.
Like most children coming from similar circumstances a child from a dysfunctional home grows up feeling abandoned. He or she believes that God had rejected them. To be sure, it was never God who rejected. his belief was projected onto God from the experiences as a rejected child. This is the itinerary of what is called projection, especially in the child who sees clearly that his parent(s) are crazy. Usually the child who is singled out and often labeled as the “black sheep” is the one in whom the light shines brightest. They fill the jails and prisons as well as the gangs and the whorehouses and are even some of the homeless. They are often tormented with the nagging feeling that something was so wrong with them, as children, that all their troubles originated with them! Feelings of inferiority makes them settle for the low-life. Yet it was never because they were unworthy. They were actually more worthy! Without knowing it they proved a cogent threat to parents and politicians who opposed their clear vision. The parents deflective mind games were angrily internalized and carried forward into sexual maturity. These minds game became part of their psychic which became their character.
The Female
Such children believe God has rejected them. In the case of a female led to the false conclusion that the only hope of fulfillment was in the eyes of a man, one she could make into a god for the purpose of accepting her. To achieve this goal, her submissive programming dictated that she give herself too easily, especially to weak men with characteristics most like her father. By trying to be the very best wife a woman can be, she often attempts to make her husband happy, sexually if in no other way. Many women believe in the beginning that such a man will complete their needs with his love.
Unfortunately, spoiling the man rotten sets her stage for more disaster. The ripe fruit of this is a manipulated love. This love doesn’t come from the heart. Affection received in this fashion not only will never satisfy, it demands even more of what cannot satisfy also. Such people are damned if they get love and just as damned when they don’t. Let me indulge you for a moment in a fifteen years old girl poetically venting her anguishing soul on her unfortunate distorted view of love.
My Resplendence
I know my repent may come as a distraction to what you are used to but my reason for being repent is my resplendence,
Being marked by the absence of love and receiving or being showed no love has made that kind of insecurity.
I the kind that gives affection based on admiration or benevolence, warm attachment, enthusiasm and devotion
Strong affection for another based on kinship or resplendence is Love.
My love for you is certainly not based on sexual desire or disappointment.
I feel laxly with you. My unselfish, loyal concern for the good of you overwhelms me…simple fact that I receive it back
My writing two months ago were on intense hostility and aversion, distal coupled with sustain of hatred.
You no doubt changed my view of love and hate. You separated what’s different to feel your love , passion, devotion and tenderness is more then any materialistic item that could gift me.
I feel as if your love is delicately beautiful, priceless.
I take pleasure in thriving for more of your love
And I love you for loving me so much.
Jennifer Espejo
The Man
To satisfy the inordinate need of misplaced love a weak man is (that’s the majority of us man) required to give more and more attention to his wife. He becomes entirely absorbed in her. In exchange for the sexual validation of his ego he works harder and harder to satisfy her increasing, unreasonable demands. Such a man feels himself being devoured. He drinks, gambles, plays too much golf or frequents the red-light district, trying to soothe his growing anxiety. This type of love drives husbands into the arms of other women. A boy abused by his mother becomes one of two extremes; either a spoiled hateful contemptuous abuser of women, or a submissive feminized man to his mannish wife, playing the role of an abused little girl. Even if a man is not a tyrant, excessive female servitude may well turn him into one. Denied the glory of his love, she makes him into a familiar hate object and literally puffs up with the secret pleasures of judgement and martyrdom. An ego can derive a perverse high from hate as well as from “love” — a vicious cycle where the guilt of judgement morphs into an endless agony and ecstasy of love/hate. Either way, a godlike sense of always being right and never wrong prevails in both members.
It is at such a time as this that perhaps you, became grossly pathological in a hate-based projection of rage. This process eventually developed into a hatred for all men. Turning toward their sons and daughters for that warped affection, parents drive their children away. This is the face of projection. For all the Cindy’s and Toms of the world, projection is a way of passing along, from oneself, the burning anger handed to them by someone else. For some, like Elizabeth Taylor and Marilyn Monroe, this happens over and over again, until death or a Betty Ford-like clinic claims you. Sooner or later it is the destiny of all those who seek love in all those wrong places. Eventually, all experience the devastating shock of disappointment. Projection is the means by which the defamed character of parents is transfer to their children.
When we are made to believe that we are so unworthy that even God has rejected us, then our only recourse is to appoint a god, making us a god maker. We can even secretly hope to be recognized by our creation. But there are two serious problems with this avenue of escape. First, there is the real God, who is no coward. Secondly, anyone who would accept such an appointment (the man or woman) is bound to be a bigger disappointment than the last. This sends us back to the beginning of the vicious circle. In the absence of real answers we are forced to recreate our failing parents in our mates. This of course leads to disappointment of the false expectation we put on people which drives a person than to judgement.
A batter woman’s unhappy life typifies our own misery, in one form or another. Her servitude, masquerading as undying love, is in reality power-food for a tyrant. It compelled her to play a crucial, ancient role in the next generation’s despotism. Unforgiving sets us all upon similar paths. Unresolved hate, especially hate hiding behind a serving, sweet smile, predestines us to play the role of slave or tyrant. Until this hidden cause is revealed and resolved, our lives will go from bad to worse. For your own sake you must develop loads of compassion for your wayward, trapped parents. Forgiving them is really letting go of their debt to you. Only then will the past free you from a hellish, compulsive future that will surely rain down the hot tar of hell onto your own family’s heads.
Fathers
As a married person you will most likely find yourself in your parents’ shoes. You’ll discover, to your horror, that you can no more keep yourself from hurting the ones you think you love than your parents could keep from hurting you. For better or for worse, every father is a bureaucrat. By default of his heavenly role this was ushered onto him by original sin. His job should have been that of a centurion, in regard to his child’s innocence. But like most fathers he became a disappointment and the child’s first violator! Children, without ever being taught, associate fathers with God. Any rejection or disappointment with him becomes the automatic equivalent to a rejection of God. The way a person feels about the father they can see tends to be the way they feel about the God they cannot see. Positively, the genuine love of father becomes a roundabout way of embracing God, the wordless truth within. The love of a good father is not a love that comes directly from him. Instead, it floats though him. This love exhorts you to take a firm grip on the same wordless love in your own heart, exactly as he has done. In other words, he inspires you to have the same faith that becomes what is known as confidence. The good you see in dad is not really him. It is a higher good he embraces in his heart.
Nobility
A young girl whose joy is complete by loving her father is naturally drawn to serve the good in a special man. Her future husband isn’t special because she makes him so. He was special before she knew him. She chooses her husband for the characteristic she loves in her father. The man of this woman’s dreams is not weak for that twisted, counterfeit love. He carries no inordinate needs, typical of weak men. A noble man, respected for his integrity, can never be spoiled by a woman’s love. What he has found inside is better than her love. Honest women know and respect this. He is loyal to her for no other reason than a genuine concern for her well-being. This rare breed of man/woman is loyal to what is right in their own heart first. In the same manner that hate is projected from an angry heart, so goes the opposite. Genuine love extends to everyone in its proximity. It finds completion in wife/husband, children and even community. This is the way that real love becomes the building blocks for the Kingdom of God on Earth.
Judgement
Everyone comes into the world with a special gift, that of discernment of right and wrong. Even a child is aware of doing wrong on a child level. Adam and Eve had this attribute but the pull of the flesh overcame them and they chose knowingly to disobey YHWH. Discernment is the wordless way of knowing how to safely navigate through the ugly realities of life. Whenever any emotion (love or hate) is added to the humility of innocence inherent in discernment, the soul loses that clear perception. Such are battered woman and bashed children who are so emotionally damaged they commence on a damaged control situation leading to emotional damnation. These have lost the unemotional variety of judgement (discernment) which is the righteous judgement to which the Scriptures refer. Secret judgement are those small indictments we make on people without cause. Females are somehow expert on this. They will judge their mate whenever the opportunity should present itself.
As matter of observation females will even set their mates up for failure and then judge them. It is a way of the Ego feeding off negative energy given off. It eventually becomes so ingrain as part of their character it takes place instantaneously unnoticed like water flowing as a river. This spreads out into the work place as bosses male and female alike set up their employees for failure just to feed off the negative energy. In general society in order to keep the jail house full keep certain part of its citizen debased. How? By the lack of proper education in elementary thru high school all the way to college. Today the average college graduate can’t even write a proper resume. After four years of college!
The King
The prerogative of a King is to judge and condemn, to give and receive praise. In the highest sense, the supreme God of the universe alone possesses this ultimate right to judge who is good and who is evil. ‘Judge not and you shall not be judge“, proclaims the Scriptures. The moment we take upon ourselves this mantle and puff up with anger or with praise, we begin to experience an unfathomable anxiety and self-condemnation. These things take place in a transparent way within our soul, the inner workings of evil which floated thru our first parents on to us. But we have had no idea what is going on, until now that is. Judgement means having premeditation of a situation or person at a moments notice without all the facts. Often time this takes place at a twinkling of an eye. Such as when we see a person and something about them just don’t seem right to us without having met them. We indict them on the spot which is judgement. Our defamed human nature requires a leadership with the same frame of mind. A King who will give what people think they want will render to Caesar what Caesar wants. Judgement from the King to the people and from the people to the King. A chronic perfect relationship brewing in the pot that unenviable day of the Lord!
Discernment
However, in the absence of emotional excitement, especially in the case of resentment, anger and rage, there comes this indwelling light, revealing to the eye of our soul the truth about everything, but often not immediately. Discernment does not allow us to jump to conclusions. Discernment watches and waits patiently to be sure, and when it is, it calmly and deliberately acts out of good, curing and preventing problems by not overreacting.
Since no god can be wrong and still be god and since you think you are a god, the worst in you draws out the worst in him or her to shore up the image of your deformed self worth. And so you go on denying reality, not willing to face you are wrong, setting people up to fail, knocking people down and living in comparison to inferiors. You probably modeled this pattern of behaviour during your formative years. You may have been set up and sacrificed for family judgement. The family is where it all starts and you were judged by them and a label was put on you. Consequently you hated to be like them, but your hatred tricked you, trapped and programmed you into a future of letting people continue to out-judge you. You became like them nevertheless.
Your judgement now is judgement food for predators. Your own secret life of judgement is the loser. It is a (martyr’s) judgement on a devil dredged up for that purpose. You have unwittingly created evil by which comparison you glory in servitude and suffering. You have become part of the process of the chain gang from hell, weak before the strong and most likely, hatefully puffed up towards those who are weaker. Consider your everyday actions in relationship to those around you.
At this point there are two ways to overcome the inferiority of failing. The preferable goal should be to get out of your love-hate system. Unfortunately, that is only likely to happen after much suffering and searching for what went wrong. When rock bottoms hits home. You could stubbornly go on knocking others down and building yourself up, doing unto others what was done unto you. You could continue your saving failures seeking that illusive recognition with those who always turn out to be ungrateful bums and tyrants. Or you can make that turn around and start reshaping your future.
Human Love
Rage and judgement blinds and lead to the need for their delusional twin, the kissing, worshipful love. And when love betrays, as it surely will, that leads right back to hate again. The purring pleasure toward those who see you in a good light is just as such a judgement upon them as your condemnation of those who see you in a bad light. With each sin comes a judgement upon your judgement, experienced as anxiety, despair and depression, along with many psychosomatic manifestations of the underlying cause. Your good accepted judgement should then be the righteous judgement of God almighty who’s judgement alone is equitable. Let His pad of the back be your accepted judgement not what your emotions conjures in your mind.
Lovers for example will become betrayers in disguise. You know the playing of a role just to be accepted by the other who is also doing the same. They will play along in exchange for power. See how much you gave of yourself for an illusion of worth for fear of judgement? That’s all it ever was, an illusion. All human love relationships are less than honest in respect to true love. You could never attract honest love and real people because they would never play your game. You see, the only way any person with low self-esteem seeks love is through illusion and deception. In your confusion you will always draw up out of hell the familiar spirit of your lost innocence. The defamed love you grew up so well knowing in your family circle is that love you will seek unknowingly.
Human Forgiveness
Unable to rise above your guilt with/because hatred and judgement produces the compulsion to forgive, to be soft, yielding, to have sympathy for the devil. That is why human forgiveness is a worse problem than judgement ever was. Therefore, forbear to judge, and you will not fall into the dilemma of forgiving. Just as judgement, forgiveness is the prerogative of the true God and that is why the witness of your conscience follows you as you practice them. Your human forgiveness can only condone evil. This sets the wrongdoer up to hurt you again, for which you hate them more and more. Human forgiveness is not the same as divine forgiveness. In judging and then forgiving you are still playing God. The God of your conscience is following you all the way to the grave trying to save you. But you resent his saving judgement and see his presence as the enemy, the internal parent punisher.
Repent
Of what should you repent then. Surely it is the pride of both judging and forgiving. You need to find that neutral zone somewhere between the extremes of judgement and forgiveness. This is the state of awareness called discernment. Don’t take things so personally. Do not be lifted up by praise or upset by criticism. Endure these two impostors without swelling with pride. Do not fall to judgement or to praise. Do not seek love and approval. Watch yourself looking for faults. Remain centered and preserve that innocent watchfulness that is the righteous judgement of discernment. Forbear to judge and you won’t need to forgive. Pride abandons God’s presence and craves exaltation which leads a person to become a self-pleaser. Pride debases the intellect and enjoys being degraded and uplifted by it’s lustful desire for pleasures. Collectively the mass enjoys these emotional highs, which keep them all asleep to the reality of their sins. Someone makes a cracking sexual joke and a collective vomiting of giggles engulfs the atmosphere with no one having the guts or fortitude to stand up against it. Therefore, let us awaken and submit ourselves to the unchangeable God who stands above us waiting patiently to truly forgive and redeem. He is the One who holds the salvation of completeness and who make us whole and free. Your motto aparandi should be a God centered spirit which can only begotten from Him.
The Nation
Tyranny extends out into the fabrication of nations. Underneath every King and his system of governing is nothing more than a dictator cloaked under a political name. Now how does such systems get the worshippers to worshiping party? Why the same manner in which Satan got to mother Eve. The classic precursor to dictatorship is to promote immorality, promiscuity and license as though it were freedom. From broken homes emerge food for tyrant whom are the residents. Tyrants create wimps who in turn become tyrants that make wimps — a dog-eat-dog, military chain of command. Like vampires in transition, the lesser tyrants bow before their superior anti-human corruptors all the way up to the head of the snake. All tyrants exist in a food chain of command with wimps before tyrants and tyrants as wimps all passing their powers up all the way up to the presiding entity, while its vile identity (the character of its evil nature) passes down to the lowest nothing on the totem pole. For some even worship their children.
The power of government has its power in its numbers of followers. Without appeasers, tyrannical political power could never exist. If your sense of existence has come down to depend upon the violator’s lying love–resistance is futile–too little too late. Give that special someone power and you may enjoy a momentary rush of a good image that you will, forever, in futility, try to recapture because your ever-crumbling illusion of self-worth demands the perpetual reinforcement of your servitude. At that time, it will become psycho-physiologically impossible to criticize any authority. Even now, all too many Americans fail to deal with daily stresses – they are already going along to get along. Hence, the King down to the bottom line politician get the people to bow down to their very command. But when that time comes, when you see love in all the wrong places, love of people, country, culture, etc, then all that is left is to take pleasure in judgement and glory, in pure hatred. All your appointments crumble into disappointments, and the fake face of love eventually reveals itself for what it was all along – enslavement to a living hell on earth perhaps finally in a concentration camp.
All such love is the transference of childhood-conditioned servitude, a perverse love that arises only out of hate. The abused are unable to “love” unless they are first abused. Why all this? Simply because the love of God is not in man’s heart whom he needs in order be a wholesome creation.
Yashuah (Jesus) having to face the Roman Empire all by himself had to endure the system of tyrants/wimps which he did not bow down to. Even his disciples could not break free of the stronghold of their mental enslavement. Being true to his conscious the system couldn’t break him and Pilot seeing no ill him breaking the law could not indict him and he gave him over to the people. The people sick as a batter woman crucified him thereby appeasing the tyrant which fed their sick ego. They like people in all generation were god makers and Pilot made a god in turn gave them what they wanted the satisfaction of boosting their ego. Still today people cry out “We want a king like the rest of the nation” and don’t want God in their lives. Therefore, through the power given to the unjust, future demoralized nations rise up and allow themselves to be ruled by the most vicious kinds of political beasts. The New World Order will materialize into the world scene made possible by the very oppressed who will in turn bow down to it. The enlightened ones will be accused of being unpatriotic and exercised.
What is happening here is a terrible need for a false sense of worth which mentally enslaves the multitudes to tyrants. Whether personal or political, our individual or collective destiny is sure to replicate our childhood cultural miseries. Anyone who will come to terms with his true self will inevitably will have to endure the wrath of the governing apparatus starting first with the immediate family. Therefore, brace yourself for the impending conflict you will have to face should you decide to make a change from the system. Before you have finished reading, it may dawn on you (don’t be frightened) that you have indeed come from a home or circumstance ruled by its most willful and sickest member and consequently taken on their identity. No tyrant worth his salt will allow any child to be true to him or herself.
The Fix
What must happen then, you and your family is to be saved, is the head of the family, the man, must turn back to his Creator that he may become whole spiritually with an understanding mind and in turn that will save the woman and the children. The only weapon against evil is the understanding mind of righteousness. By the love of God’s power the enlightened man is not afraid to see the naked evil. But first, however, he must be overcome by that which is good. The moment of Truth for all men is in the face of temptation. This is the pivotal point in the reconciliation process when man makes a choice and turns around. There is no courage without danger; there is no virtue without temptation. Just as courage dispels the danger, so does virtue dispel the evil. However, we must see the error for what it is, no more, no less. Only by the un-judging, neutral nature of our conscience can we observe the contrast to what is truly right and good. This my friends begins the renewing of the mind spoken in the Scriptures.
The Process
And so as truth comes around, and it does in various ways the veil is drawn aside, something in you may die; for each man is, at best, a veneer of good that conceals a vampire cave of cackling horrors. There may arise in you a terrible hatred, through the knowledge that you have been observed by that someone (when you are told to the face); a fear may envelope your soul as your defenses crumble. Yet, if you repent of your ways, the anguish shall give way to joy again, just as travail ends for a woman in the joy of her first-born. At this moment of understanding you have a choice to continue on your path of error or to claim virtue and happiness. Here is the nitty gritty human process of transformation taking place within the quietness of your soul where you find yourself face to face with God. Your moment of choosing the tree of life or continuing in evil.
If you repent not of your ways, if you are not overcome by Truth the old man remains in you—then shall your own hatred of Truth make only that which is more evil welcome in your soul; that twisted, tormented soul that still, and always, sees itself as good, because it has allowed what is bad. Because of its unseemly ways, it does not find enlightenment. Indeed, it has converted a weakness into what seems to be strength; and that strength can only be seen because the weakness of other people allows it to be seen as strength. Yet too fearful to see its weakness, so that it might be truly strong. Cursing the sickness, yet too fearful to see what it must relinquish in order to be well—one day it must be king of sickness and depravity. Its cancerous sore must be a bigger and better cancer than that possessed by others, and the praise for that suffering must become the only remaining worship you live in reality, if you are not lost in your head, you see your own nothingness.
You experience your smallness. You see that you are hardly even a squeak in the song of creation, and you know that you ought to be subject to that something greater than you. But pride does not let you go in that direction-at least, not for a season from the day it is born. It is inclined to be its own person, its own man, as in the garden of Eden when the serpent advised Eve to eat of the fruit of the knowledge of good and evil in order to become like a god. As YHWH warned them that if they ate of it they would surely die, but they were deceived by the evil one, so stand you at those moments. In your high heavens from you must come down as had to the King of Tyrus, Nebuchadnezzar, Capernaum and so will the rest of all humanity.
Those internal conflicts boiling in you from a life wrongly lived contrast the paths of right and wrong. From the agony and ecstasy of both judgement and forgiveness you are beginning to be awakened by the light. All those judgements of others were always followed by a moment of truth and a judgement upon your judgement. How much pain are you going to endure before you see what this means? This judgement unresolved in the mind projects itself onto others in a form of wrathful anger upon parents, children, friends, love ones, employees, authority, etc. The proclivity to internalize, and then vent anger is psychologically inherent in the human condition. This is the root cause of bigotry, racism and the need for an enemy. The birthplace of this rage is the family or lack of one. From here it moves to the battlefield, in war. Whether nation or individual, internalized rage is not always vented and what happens then? It is often turned inward toward the self. This is the way of weak conformists. The results are volcanic emotional eruptions and pathological harm that eventually manifest as disease physical and mental. This may be the actual cause of cancer with its alien type of cellular distortion. It cannot be treated with conventional medicine but radiation because it cannot be understood in known medical terms.
Let me briefly touch on a delicate subject. This is the black man’s legitimate resentment against those that have enslave them and robbed them of their cultural identity. But resentment towards these perpetrators is the stumbling block to wholesomeness a people violated must come to understand and overcome. Reprisal of anger is the very thing that will keep the mind enslaved. If wholesomeness is to prevail a rendering of the inherent self centered ego must take place even in this case. Whites did the injustice as a result of an superiority complex which deep down is nothing more than a frighten coward unable to face his despicable self and needing a victim to unleash the denial of his fear to recognize his sad state apart from God. It is the ultimate form of self divinity, belittling and lording other human being. It would have been no different if the tables were turned.
If anyone is to survive family, school or sexual abuse, it will be through character strength and in spite of tribulation. It is a mystery a small percentage will always manage to mature beyond their sufferings to become solid sovereign man and woman. Unfortunately, most children never mature beyond their childhood roles of being bullies or cowards. There are not enough psychiatrists or psychologists in the world with sufficient knowledge to fix so many minds and broken spirits. All too often, it is authorities in the guise of doctor or priest, who become the cause for such suffering or even worse, the “cure” implemented by the same system they worship.
This friends is the way of the beast system. The way of the Ego.